Uncovering The Bravery Within

It took me a while to figure out what not-so-private-part of me I wanted to share. Truthfully, because I’m in a new space in my journey where I’m rediscovering myself. I would jot down notes - take a break. Entertain the thought again, and then busy myself with the kids. The thought of sharing something intimate made my chest tight and my breath heavy. But I knew this was exactly why (and what) I needed to share. 

I’m a non-confrontational person by nature. Occasionally, passive aggressive even…sometimes to a fault. I'm not one for drama. Notoriously known for being the “peacemaker”, I feel much more comfortable being a force behind the scenes; a worker bee rather than in the lime light. In fact, i’ve never been comfortable with being the center of attention, and I really hadn't become conscious of this until adulthood. 

I didn’t grow up in a home that fostered fear. My parents were incredibly encouraging and supportive. They always told me I could do whatever I put my mind to. They put me in practically every activity I expressed interest in - piano, art, tennis, ballet, etc. - but I didn’t stick with many of them. As I grew older, I reasoned that my list of experiences made me eclectic and cultured. And while I'm sure those were contributing benefits, in many ways I was being non confrontational within my very own being. I hated feeling uncomfortable. I feared the eyes of the crowd watching my every moved. I feared being a failure. So if it didn’t come naturally to me, or if it required being but on display, I shied away from it. I enjoyed taking piano lessons, but when the subject of recitals came up, I peaced out. I loved playing tennis and thought how cool playing at Wimbledon might be, but that meant you had to show up for matches right? Thankfully, most things did come fairly easily, but I developed a somewhat false sense of bravery. 

I used to think I was outgoing. And while thats not totally untrue, I took to rationalizing things to justify fears. In college I initially intended on studying fashion design, but thought the fashion industry may be volatile (truth moment :: I watched the devil wears Prada and it scared the living daylights out of me. I was not cut out for all that cut throat tom-foolery) and majored in marketing instead. When I reflected back on instances like this that sprinkle my past, I knew it was something that needed to be addressed. ASAP

I wanted to be brave and not just the pseudo courage I’d project in situations I could predict the outcome. But the kind of bravery that holds when conditions are uncomfortable. Brave when I have absolutely no power over the end result. Brave when my best may not beat out someone else’s, but I still come out of the process knowing I'm enough and that my efforts were valiant. Now that I’ve become a mother, I didn't want my children to see that in me. Although they must create their own path, I want them to know they are capable of anything and for them to have very best model of courage in front of them. I needed my legacy to be one of perseverance; for myself, for my children, and anyone else watching. 

Well, be careful what you ask for because 2015 was a tumultuous year and my opportunities for an acts of valor came knocking. One of my biggest test, was going through divorce. Life as I knew it with my love and companion for nearly a decade was coming to an end. All those familiar feelings came rushing back. This wasn’t at all what I wanted for my life and after trying several different remedies, it was truly the last option. But I could already feel the judging eyes, and hear the whisper of prying questions. I didn't want people to think I didn't try. I didn't want to be seen as a failure. But a divorce isn’t a matter of failure. It’s an act of bravery. It was an opportunity to courageously let each other go; Not because it was the easy thing to do, but because it was the right thing to do. I wanted our children to see love in the healthiest way possible, even if that meant being apart.  Moreover, I knew in that moment and the subsequent moments to follow, there was no turning away. This time I chose to face my fears. 

Each day in our lives offers opportunities for acts of bravery, big and small. Don't shy away from your path. While the outcomes are uncertain, courage is the gateway to healing and new beginnings. Once I made that choice to press through, I started living more beautifully and purposefully than I ever had when I let fear hold me back. If you're not willing to challenge yourself, you're not living. Your complying with life. You must address the obstacles ahead, follow your heart, and stay the course. That is the true test of courage.

The Best Version of Myself...

Fitness has always been a part of my life whether for recreation, competition or most recently for the sole reason of being the best version of myself. Best version of MYSELF. Not the best version in general, because that mindset inevitably brings forth comparison and comparison in my opinion is the archenemy to a healthy self-esteem. 

If I hadn't discovered this revelation I would be disgusted with my body image today and would be putting forth far too many efforts toward immediate change back to my physically fit self. I would see all the picture perfect mamas on Instagram and feel like trash due to my few new stretch marks, the extra weight around my thighs/midsection, how my hip bones have shifted for good. Thankfully I am no longer in the business of comparison and all of these changes have only fueled my womanly empowerment! I am so proud of this body and what it has accomplished, I have grace for it and am giving it the necessary time to heal..do I want to be fit again? Of course! But in good timing and not because I want countless likes on Instagram. Majority of my energy is going toward nurturing a newly earth side baby, making sure that she feels safe and loved. My time is spent no better way than with her laying skin to skin on my chest for as long as she sees fit. 

We are unconsciously programmed from a very young age to dress, act, be a certain way and as mothers if we are not intentional about guarding our children's hearts and minds they will continue to fall victim to fueling their progress in life by insecurities. I'm not saying that society is evil or trends are of the devil but when I see people putting more stock in how others will perceive them over their very own peace of mind and contentment that is what does not sit well within my soul. 

Every human deserves to be seen, to be loved, to be accepted for their most genuine self but the trouble is many are unwilling to be vulnerable enough for that acknowledgment. Hiding in plain sight has been mastered by an amazing amount of people and it breaks my heart to be aware of just how much potential is being hidden behind the fear of failure and loneliness. Realistically every successful person who had to put in their own efforts to get there has faced many failures along the way and as far as loneliness goes all of my revelations, spiritual awakenings or simple realization of common sense has never come to me while I'm out with my girls, getting ready for a concert or even having a Netflix&chill with my soulmate but RATHER in complete solitude.

I have found a respect for myself over the past few years that allows me to treat others with grace and understanding. Through trial and error, meditation and allowing the universe to finally do its thing in my life I have found that I am here to be a kind and loving inspiration of truth. My mind is at peace knowing that my purpose is simple and attainable, not easy but worth the effort because in return I am continually blessed by the addition of deep and richly invested friendships, the kind that don't give up on you when you slip up and act like a complete idiot for some reason or another. Shoutout to Shannon and Roxane, I love you girls. 

I hope that a sentence or two has deeply resonated within whomever may be reading these words.

In conclusion...

-If you haven't already, start the journey toward becoming your very best SELF. That may mean; purging your home of useless junk, eating better, working out, making time for solitude, reading a book, smelling some flowers, rekindling a forgotten hobby, nurturing a meaningful friendship.. Etc...

-if you happen to be a mother please brainstorm and consider ways that you can be very intentional about raising up your young one(s) to be entirely aware of their self worth. Make sure they know just how essential and important they are. This may mean; allowing them to be curious even if that means you don't always have the answers, praising their ideas instead of questioning them, telling them that they are wonderful.. Etc...

Close your eyes, smile and be at peace 🙏🏻
Namaste
Summer dawn
 

Q&A With Joy Bryant... Loving the Skin You're In

NSPP--What does loving the skin you’re in mean to you?

JB--It means accepting myself- mind, body and soul. It means being comfortable with who I am. Flaws and all.

NSPP--What has proven to be the most important lesson learned thus far?

JB--That I can’t look to the world to validate me. I don’t need the world to tell me anything about myself that I should already know: that I am lovable; that my voice matters; that my ideas make sense and deserve the space to expand.

NSPP--in a world full of patriarchy..How do you fight to own your body?

JB--Being older, married and more secure in who I am, I don’t have the need to cater to the male gaze at large anymore. Only one male’s gaze matters, my husband’s, and even then I’d like to think his gaze is not solely focused on my physical attributes, but what’s going on in my mind and in my heart. 

NSPP--Would your younger self like the person that you are today?

JB--Hell yeah she would! 

Photo Credit: Kristen Cleary

NSPP--What piece of advise would your older self give to your younger self? and Vice Versa.

JB--I would tell her to stop trying to be like everybody else, stop trying to be cool. “Being cool” for the sake of just being cool is so overrated and wack! The coolest people are the ones who are simply themselves no matter what. I would tell her that she’s beautiful as she is.

NSPP--What are your thoughts on the #BlackGirlMagic Movement? Do you believe that its necessary? If so, why? How do you spread #BlackGirlMagic?

JB--Black Girl Magic is a declaration that our beauty, our humanity matters: from the physical to the spiritual, the intellectual and the emotional. Black Girl Magic is our unapologetic presence, our liberation, our gift to the world,our gift to ourselves and each other.

NSPP-If you were abandoned on an island…alone…AND you could only bring 3 items…what would those 3 items be?  

JB--The book, “Women Who Run With The Wolves”, a notebook and a pencil.

Photo Credit: Kristen Cleary

No Shame In Living Vibrantly

I was the kid at the camp lunch table who could be heard saying, “Is anyone going to eat those stringed beans?” (…meaning the entire bowl!) I loved eating clean food.  I was also the kid who climbed up on my dad’s workshop stool to reach for his needle-nose pliers so I could use it to meticulously navigate and then remove the dried up “gunk” from the Elmer’s Glue orange nozzle. I had a knack for clearing out clogged up spaces! In grade school, I remember loving the fragrance of “Love’s Baby Soft” as it would float through the air when classmate Kim Vileno walked by on any given day. I had a nose for scents! This introspection validates my belief that we all have moments in our childhood that point to the professional path we may take later on in life.

I am vegan. 

I am a Certified Colon Hydrotherapist. 

I teach and empower others how to use Essential Oils for daily living. Ka-Pow!

My childhood was truly awesome! I grew up with a super-cool brother and awesome parents who have been married for over fifty years. But in light of the fact that my dad could easily have been a stand-up comedian, he started suffering with severe manic depression in his 40’s. He suffered for decades while trying a variety of options that didn’t hold water and his quality of life and career were severely impacted. The nurturer in me wanted to discover a better solution.

My professional career started out in advertising but a chance colon hydrotherapy treatment in my early twenties helped place my health back in my own hands and changed my career path forever! Colon Hydrotherapy provided me with many personal game-changing health transformations and right before I turned thirty, an opportunity to change my profession and share the benefits of this work with others fell in my lap. Colon hydrotherapy had liberated me from infirmity and chronic health conditions (ear, nose, throat infections, poor complexion, allergic reactions, weight management, herniated disc, etc.) so I was compelled to share with others how easy it was to reclaim THEIR health and liberate themselves from illness naturally, too!

Over the years, I used Essential Oils (solely for the scent) but once I took a certification course in 2015, the science behind the scent completely revolutionized my knowledge of them and has truly benefitted my practice. Now that I have implemented doTERRA Essential Oils to my personal life and with my clients at The Springs, I can honestly say that the thought of working without them feels like I’d be wearing handcuffs! 

Personally, I will share that I had three adverse life-changing experiences occur one right after the other: 1. I closed my NYC practice of seven years and separated from my business partner in doing so. 2. My husband, who I was with for fourteen years and I decided to end our marriage (amicably but still…) 3. I decided to move from New York (where I lived my entire life) to LA and begin a new life and take on a role at a brand new business. My physical health was in tact but emotionally, you can guess, I needed some radical support! Essential Oils rescued and comforted me through the most challenging times of my life; they allowed me to remain competent in the face of adversity while I trained new therapists and helped birth a division of a new company! For the sake of brevity and intrigue, come to a FREE class to learn more about how they work in this way! Or stay tuned to Brandi’s blog for our future classes and specifically the one we will offer on Emotions and Essential Oils! 

As a health practitioner, my approach with my clients is “the guru is you.” My goal is to provide them with safe, effective, affordable, and easy-to-use tools that they can implement in their everyday lives – in the absence of harmful side effects. Working with essential oils allows me to do exactly that – share powerful and beautifully aromatic plant-based medicinals that they can resort to outside of their colon hydrotherapy sessions when unexpected issues may pop-up! These oils provide results - whether we are trouble-shooting a physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional issue – there’s an oil for that! 

Beyond the importance of purity of the oils, much like I am sure many of you have some personal non-negotiables, I love knowing that the companies I align myself with are passionate about their mission, uphold a strong ethical code, and seek to extend their impact beyond just their product or brand to impact the globe. I found two! The Springs and doTERRA! doTERRA’s heart-centered mission to “Place a Healer In Every Home” is the reason why I now teach ongoing classes here (and around the world) …to help empower others and build our community. Learning how to use these pure plant extracts is revolutionizing the way we mange self care. For many, the oils have even created residual income, which helps lift them and their families out of financial dept so they can be luminaries and help inspire others to do the same. Their unique Co-Impact Farming model nurtures century old botanical traditions and creates sustainability of newly developing nations, allowing them to use their own natural resources to life themselves out of poverty. Their humanitarian organization, Healing Hands Foundation, gives 100% of it’s contributions to build birthing centers, schools, water lines, hospitals, and even educate and dispel stigma around young girls menstrual cycles so they can stay in school and graduate to go on and lead more productive lives and live out their dreams! When we use these oils, we are all contributing to these bounties! I love making a difference!

I feel so lucky to be able to share these gifts from the earth with those I may come into contact with on a daily basis (ok, yeah, maybe Uber driver’s love me). They are a joy to share with my clients – some of whom have found me that reside in other countries that I’ve never even traveled to! The oils are a new and powerful modality for me that I love to teach to others so they can transform on all levels, too! When all of our bodily systems are nourished equally, joy, freedom, and bliss will always be ours to share – drop by precious drop!

In Honor of National Donut Day... 5 Things That Make Life Sweet

1. Family..
Family is everything. It looks different for everyone. It feels different. After my mother passed away, I found myself clinging to my immediate family. My husband... My children. They kept me grounded. Flooding me with love and support. 

2.Friends you can trust/ your village
There is nothing like a good friend. I don't take friendship lightly. Living in Los Angeles, without blood relatives is quite the task. There is no such thing as "to Grandmother's house we go". When we had our second kiddo, I was overwhelmed by the love and support from our village. I had such beautiful spirits surrounding me with love... Pushing me onward... Holding my hand... 

3. Good food
I love food!! Good food. Food that nourishes and pays honor to our magnificent bodies. I truly believe we are what we eat... Eat well.

4. Health/ peace of mind.. 
Being in good health and peace of mind is golden. I am a firm believe that we have one body, and it is beyond important to honor, cherish it, and thank it for serving us well. There are so many people who are suffering. Their bodies are failing. It is so important to be great-FULL.. Health and wellness is a gift.. Peace is a gift. 

5. Home
Home is not only where the heart is... It is where peace resides. Home is our sanctuary.  At home we are nourished.. Bathed in love..accepted... We guard our home as if it is our hearts... Because it is so very close to it.